Welcome Home Daddy!

Music "Children's Song" by olstein Sevag from the Album WINDOWS-25 Years of Piano

A Peek Into My Day

I guess today is as good as any to give one a peek into the day of a stay at home mom of four. My beloved will soon be home from his tour in Iraq, so this is a unique look at my day!

Normally, my alarm is set to go off at 6am, and this morning, it was, but I must have turned the volume down because I didn't hear it go off. Praise the Lord, He allowed me to wake up at 7am which still allowed me a little over a half hour to get my two oldest girls, ages 8 and 6 ready for school. The girls woke up quickly and I ironed their PE uniforms that they were to wear for Friday. My dryer broke a few days ago...(it must be on strike with the leaky garbage disposal and the ever running toilet since they all have been giving me attitude within the same week)...so, the uniforms were still a bit damp around the waist band where I had hung them to dry. I tried to at least heat it up to where the girls wouldn't notice....they did.

Lunches were packed, breakfast eaten, hair was done, backpacks organized , and finally, I woke up the youngest two to load them in the car for the 10 minute trip to school. After dropping off the girls and getting home...I started my morning clean up and making beds getting dressed, and then, I realized it was Friday and if I wanted to get the laundry over to the laundromat, I had better get going. Googled some laundromats, made some phone calls and then I got Lily and Ayden ready, took a look at the 3...yes THREE baskets of laundry that needed to go, and chickened out. I decided to buy a clothes line since the weather has been so mild and seeming to beg for some laundry to dry.

We loaded up, the 3 of us, after some breakfast and a snack. The kids have been in desperate need of Fall clothes and I prayed as I pulled into Kohls that I would be a good steward. I actually was, by the grace of God and with the help of the 50% off sales rampant throughout. I spent under $30 for 4 shirts, one for each child and a pair of socks. Next, we headed over to the library to return an overdue video and some books that Brianna finished well before the due date. Ayden and Lily wanted to go in, but I needed to head over to check the thrift store for some pants. We would have to do the library another day. The thrift store was just down the road, conveniently, and I found pants for each child and a shirt for Ayden. Each item was priced at around $2.99 which wasn't too bad. I prefer the .25cent finds at garage sales, though ;) In the midst of it...I got a message from my husband. I guess there was no reception in the store lol, it just figured and my poor husband had waited for who knows how long in line for the phone to call me. I would have been upset if he wasn't scheduled to come home so soon, but since he was, I felt badly for him, and not so much for me.

The kids and I were starting to get hungry and so I got some fries for them and a soda for me to tide us over until we could get home. We had one last stop to make before it was time to pick up the girls. Ayden fell asleep on the way to Walmart where I was intending on getting the clothes line. I also had some items I needed to return and of course the line was about 10 deep. Poor Ayden was so thirsty and so I smiled as Lily hoisted him up to the fountain just a few feet from the line in customer service. I left Walmart without the clothesline I so desperately needed and used every minute of the 10 remaining to get over to the school in time to pick up the girls.

3:05 I pull up to the sweet smiling faces of Brianna and Anjolie. The kids all talked excitedly about their new and used clothes. A new shirt and pair of pants for each of them, in some cases 2 new pants...it was like Christmas :)

As we drove home I thought about how long it would take to make my pizza dough because we had been invited to a friends house for 5pm. It usually takes me about an hour and a half to make pizza, so I knew I would be pushing it. The kids poured out of the car and into the house where I told them to quickly get their bags put away and lay down until it was time to leave so that I could make pizza. That wasn't happening....so they decided to watch the Elmo deployment video for the thousandth time while I begged the dough to not give me any problems.

4:45pm I realize that I'm not going to make it to my friends' house by 5pm but after the phone call it turns out that 5:15-30ish would be just as good since her baby was napping. By 5:05ish we all raced out of the house. Me with my piping hot pizza on my baking stone...yep, stuck it right in the front seat along with my friend's dish that I needed to return and we were off for an evening of play and fellowship. And now, it's almost 9pm and here I sit, the day is done, kids are each in their OWN beds...not mine, tonight, and I am just thanking the Lord that I have no where to be tomorrow! God is so good, all the time.

Do You Ever...

hold on so tight inside that it almost feels like you are shaking? I feel like that sometimes...gripping truth with all I've got...just holding on to the fact that the Lord WILL sustain me...and I'm holding on as if that truth could some how run off without me. It's not the big things that end up shaking me to the core. It's the overwhelming sense of loneliness in the everyday situations. For the big things, I do have plenty of support and know I have friends I can call on and family if they are needed. But, in the moments of every day *stuff* the fighting and crying and laundry, the leaky garbage disposal, the toilet that won't stop running...you know, just normal *stuff* to include the recent sick stuff, I suddenly find myself feeling very alone and tense and clinging... But finally, the Lord brings to mind that it's not me that is holding on to the truth, it is the truth within that is holding me...as if I'm gonna run off without IT. Then, I have to physically force my body to relax and my lungs to breath and just REST in that. He's got it...He's got me...I just have to relax and go with it.

Uphold me according unto thy word, that I may live: and let me not be ashamed of my hope. Hold thou me up, and I shall be safe: and I will have respect unto thy statutes continually.
Psalm 119:116-117

Bad Latch

When I had my first baby, Brianna...I was thrilled that she was ready to nurse soon after birth. So thrilled, in fact, that I let her "bad latch" slide. I thought that eventually, the situation would correct itself because at least she was getting what she needed...even if it was a little uncomfortable for me. A little uncomfortable soon turned to shuddering with pain each time she needed to nurse. And, bless her heart, she had no idea. She had a need and it was my responsibility to fill that need in a way that is healthy for BOTH of us. If only I would have in those first moments taken the time and been willing to let her cry a bit while I helped to her latch properly...then, things would not have turned so painful and unpleasant. We got it right eventually, but WOW, did it hurt, and for a good while!

I found this same idea to be true in friendships or joining a new group or new church or starting a friendship or correcting a wrong, accepting new responsibility, parenting etc...any situation in which we are equipped to meet a need. We get excited about the other persons interest or the offer to serve or the desire to rectify a wrong and so, we sometimes find ourselves in a "bad latch". We don't want to upset things and risk having no "latch" at all so, we trudge on in that unhealthy bond, growing wearier by the day. Things could be so much better, so much healthier for both if we take a step back...allow some time to heal and then step forward still willing to give completely of ourselves...but with the "good latch". I have allowed some "bad latches" in my life at this time, because I have failed to set boundaries. I have also corrected an attempt at a bad latch...which caused some initial offense but it was so worth the end result of a "good latch". I'm tempted to go on with the parallels, but I will leave it as it is....while I continue to ponder. I know, what a weird illustration...but when I think of the pain that unhealthy relationships cause...and the fact that we don't want to sever ties...because we do love and want to serve one another...but to correct and do better...the type of pain...it fits, ......I think LOL

What Road Is This?

Do you ever find yourself wondering where you made that last turn in life? I mean, I had the definitive ones, like having a baby, and another one...then repeat that 2 more times. After that it was...where did all these little ones come from and are they ever going to grow up a little so I can have a moment to myself....and now...

I have that moment. It seems like it's moving at lightning speed and I want to have something to show for it. I spent a good while the other day going back through my blog posts and reading the adventures. I watched the videos...and I wanted to cry. That seemed ages ago. But at least it's there recorded...that moment. I laughed I smiled and I cried...and I wrote it down. It might not have made all that much sense all the time, but I did attempt to capture my thoughts and feelings. To have others that enjoyed that moment too and commented...well, I have that as well...which makes this even better than a scrapbook, really :)

So, back to that turn I had made. I think I turned from the thoughtful pondering of a blog to the fast quick easy FB with lots of people who really don't know me....probably never will. They would never take the time to read a blog post...most of them.....so, I'm just thinking....jaded by a recent event and thinking....how did I get here and where do I go from here....

She Returns...

...and it is bittersweet. I have trouble "facing" my blog, and that may sound strange but it is true. This micro-dot in the cybersphere is a sort of distant "home" to my heart, and we all know, it isn't always easy to come "home". Things are never the same are they?

Seems so very strange to me that my heart can feel so heavy yet be in complete acknowledgment that God is on the throne. The experience of His Grace and the experience of the trials necessary to understand that His Grace is all sufficient, render me speechless most times. Oh, I can muster little "blurbs" on FB but to actually come here...home, to hit the pressure release valve on my heart and pour it all out onto this glaring white screen like old times, is something I am finding more and more difficult to do. The trials and burdens I am used to sharing, no longer consist of the every day consequences of a large family with a focus challenged homeschooling mommy trying to make it through the day with a clean house to boast....no...our worlds now are forever changed aren't they? Each and every one of us now bear the worry of what tomorrow will hold in this very changed nation. Then, there are the hurts and burdens of friends, loved ones...dire circumstances and health situations that seem to be of such gravity that the English language limits us to even share with one another the depths of the sorrow we feel over these circumstances. Praise the Lord, He makes intercession for us...because, I'll be honest friends, I just don't have the words, only the tears to show for the white knuckled pleading in my heart. I'm so thankful that sometimes even to say the name of Jesus is enough to flood my heart with a sense of comfort....His name and all that it means to my heart helps to focus my mind. Just to lift my flesh bound hands and say His name brings such release when I remember all that He did on the cross. His very name holds more meaning than I could write in a life-time. My precious Lord Jesus, let me never fail to find comfort in letting my burden rest on your ever listening ear...

(Catchy Title Goes Here)

Interesting phrase to get your attention...

....followed by more rambling and ... - and ** to replace any real sort of punctuation. ;)

Yes, I have already used the title "Random" so, I am sure you can think of something better and do a mental cyber-insert up there to better complete this little update. Creativity has been replaced with practicality for the time being and it is not pretty. Iam working to remedy the imbalance as quickly as possible. :)

If you are on Facebook, you probably already get my little status updates and such. I think Facebook is killing my capacity to come up with anything meaningful to put on here! But, I love you, and my blog so I will work harder at "saving" my material for this, my cyber-home.

I guess the big looming gray ominous looking cloud is that Brian deploys in a few months. He will be in and out before he deploys, but this is our first BIG separation and so I am gearing up for it mentally, spiritually, fiscally, physically and emotionally...and not necessarily in that order. The one really neat thing about BIG LOOMING GRAY clouds is that there is a huge blinding sun behind it :)

God is so good. He has placed us in this beautiful little "nest" with all that we need. I knew when He made the way for us to rent this house...He was providing for trials ahead. :) He has provided sweet fellowship with friends both far and near who have gone through this and are going through this very thing. I have family nearby (well nearer than Japan anyway.haha) who have already volunteered to come this summer and offer a helping hand. Summer is right around the corner which will be a nice boost in this upcoming winter of separation. Even this trial pales, in my heart of hearts, when compared to the *mountains* that other dear friends are scaling with the Lord's help. May the Lord always help us to see HIM even when there are dark looming clouds swirling about us.

The Hunchback of Virginia Beach

I am cracking up at how my posts always seem to be drastically different from one to the next...such is my life.

Once a month, Brian has to work with his reservists and while I am so glad I get to see him in the evenings, Sunday mornings, I miss his helping hand in getting the children ready for church. This past Sunday was especially challenging because Anjolie, who is picky anyway, was having a fit because I didn't have an extra t-shirt for her to put on under her dress...and the life threateningly tight sash was not quite tight enough...as, according to her, she could still *breath*. Quite frankly, I did not have time, nor was I in the mood, to find a solution or prepare another outfit for her to wear, and I made that fact as clear as I possibly could.

After dealing with her huffing and puffing pouting, Anjolie finished getting ready and we were all ready to walk out the door. Before we walked out, I noticed about an inch of one of Anjolie's pink pj shirts was poking out of the top of her dress...another 5 minutes of crying and pouting and correcting pass...I sent Anjolie up to her room to get the pj-shirt off and quickly loaded the other 3 in the van. Anjolie, in much better spirits, finally joins us in the car -albeit with a heavy winter coat on that I told her she would not wear into church since it was too warm for that.

The Yost family minus Daddy made it to church with 5 minutes to get 3 in Sunday School, one in nursery and myself to class...I was breathless but thankful the morning seemed to be smoothing out. My mind was full with what the day held and it was all I could do to concentrate on Pastor's class, but about midway through, I was focused on what counted- a day of worship.

You know, these crazy things that happen in this household are too crazy to be made up...this stuff is better than fiction, I tell ya. I prefaced the incident with all this to hopefully win you to the *how* I could have "missed" the "hunchback" thing. So hang on...to make this hopelessly endless....

After Sunday School, it got a little crazy again as I have to pick up the girls from class in the next building and quickly move Ayden to another nursery room sign him in, grab a pager and finally get into the sanctuary for the service. Since Brian wasn't there, I couldn't get up to choir, which turned out to be, a.good.thing. When I picked up Anjolie, I noticed that my friend wasn't there teaching, only her husband, and since he was busy, I called Anjolie to hurry and go with me to church. Anjolie turned around to say goodbye to a friend and as she turned, I saw the straaangest thing. Lo and behold, there was a leg of tights hanging down her back from her collar...............what.in.the.WORLD? Yes, a leg of white tights just uh, hangin' from the collar of her navy blue dress, like it was cool...the rest of the thing remained stuffed down her dress. At least, the foot appeared fresh and clean, I noticed-so, it coulda been worse, like the foot coulda been filthy black or something. Anyhoo, I pulled out the tights as we quickly walked to church, me shaking my head and Anjolie whining somethin' about her zipper bein' cold.... I thought, perhaps, I hadn't used enough fabric softener or something! I NEVER would have guessed they were there on purpose! Oh, honey, it aint OVER YET!

We were walking briskly, the 3 of us, and I shoved the tights quickly into my purse before we entered the main building. As we herded ourselves into a pew, I noticed Anjolie still had a huge hump on her back! I kid you not...and the row behind me was witness, to the near entire panty/sock/tights drawer that I fished out of the back of Anjolie's dress before their eyes. YES! Who knows what was going through the poor people's minds as they tried to cover their chuckles. I did what any stunned mom would do... gave a helpless hand lifted shrug and an apology....I mean, what does one SAY about something as unexplainable as this? Anjolie thought it seemed pretty logical that, since she didn't have a t-shirt to shield her back from the cold zipper...shoving the entire panty drawer down her back would have to suffice. So, have you about "heard it all" now? Somehow I'm thinkin' I shoulda just let the pink pj shirt slide...just this once.